A Trans Lament
You think I’m a monster, You think you know my life, You make policies to restrict people like me, You try to remove us from your world.
Maybe the real monster is you. Maybe you will realise the creativity you’ve lost in your world. Maybe you will one day realise how much you needed us.
We just want to exist, We just want to be us. I didn’t choose my life, My life chose me. Would I have wished for a hard life like this? No.
I may cry myself to sleep, Just like I am doing tonight as I write this. I may cry in front of my friends and family, Just like I did tonight. But I am happier than you will ever be. I know who I am. I seek to lift others up.
You may call me bitter, You may call me angry, But you made me bitter and angry. You made me exhausted. You made me who I am right now.
I will not let you keep me this way. My emotions right now will pass, I will one day not remember how you made me feel in this moment.
I ask you to please think about what your creator would think about what you are doing. Would your creator be happy that you made me feel this way? Would your creator be happy with how you’ve have treated one of their creations? How you used your religion as a holy crusade against the least of these? How you disrespected a child of God because you think you know your creator’s ways?
Please think about whether others will know you are a Christian by your love. Please ask yourself if you are treating me how you would like to be treated? Are you without sin? Can you cast the first stone?
I just want to sleep. I am about to nod off to sleep while crying, But I ask you to please just respect me. You don’t need to understand me. You don’t even need to like me. But I just want to be me, I just want to be Jae.