Reassurance

I’ve got a secret, I have not been loving myself. I have not been giving Jae the true love she needs. I’ve been masking it with others’ reassurance.

People’s opinions of me have been what I’ve been living on. This is dangerous because if someone rejects me, if someone says something willingly or ignorantly, it can hurt me.

How can I let my fiance and family love me if I don’t love myself? I have done that to them. I have pushed people away. I have attempted subconsciously to push away my best friend and partner. I pushed him to his limit many times because I didn’t love myself.

I declare that I love Jae Bloom. I love the person I am. I love my flaws. I love my strengths. I love what I’ve done. I love my mistakes for what they’ve taught me. I love my accomplishments. I love what I’ve done for people in my life. I love the impact I have had on this world and will have.

I love Jae Bloom.